“Would it be better for you if I talked to you about distracting things, explained what’s going on, or didn’t talk at all?” I asked, holding the hand of a teenage girl lying on an exam table, bracing herself for an exam she was not emotionally prepared for. “I think if you distract me,” she said, turning her head to look at me with tears in her eyes. “Okay,” I nodded, pulling my chair a little closer to the exam table. “Do you play any sports at school?”

I’ve spent the last three years volunteering with the YWCA of West Central Michigan, a branch of the national organization located in Grand Rapids. The mission of the YWCA is to eliminate racism, empower women and girls, and promote peace, justice, freedom, and dignity for all. Specifically, I volunteer with the Nurse Examiner Program, a clinic that offers medical-forensic exams (commonly referred to as “rape kits”) free of charge to survivors of sexual assault and intimate partner violence. I serve as a survivor advocate. Meaning I take 12-hour call shifts and if someone requires an exam, day or night, I go to the YWCA and support the survivor through the intake process, their interview and their exam. Afterwards, I work with the sexual assault nurse examiner to discuss safety planning with the survivor and provide community resources.

I have grown so much from this experience. I have refined communication skills I initially learned in the classroom and simulation lab. I learned how to care for individuals in crisis. I have been inspired by fearless nurses and social workers who have dedicated their careers to supporting and uplifting survivors. I have worked alongside other volunteer advocates who take time out of their busy lives to provide a listening ear and supportive hand to those in need. I have met some of the strongest women I have ever known and have had the privilege to be a small part of their story.

I expected to have these kinds of experiences when I started volunteering at the YWCA. But I think the unexpected lessons I’ve learned have shaped me just as much, if not more.

I learned that sexual assault is disgustingly common. According to the CDC, one in two women and just under one in three men will experience some form of sexual violence in their lifetime. Sexual assault is not limited to big cities and dark alleyways. 80% of survivors know their assailant. Sexual assault does exist in our communities, and it does not discriminate.

I was surprised to find that, despite its prevalence, sexual assault encounter training is largely lacking in medical school curricula. I’ve spent the last year working with my research mentor, Dr. Ryan Tubbs, on assessing ways sexual assault encounters are taught in medical schools across the country, acquiring grant funding, and outlining a sample curriculum. Whether it be College of Human Medicine faculty asking others to participate in my surveys or taking the time to share their expertise, I’ve been encouraged by the amount of support I have found within the Spartan community. We aim to have a complete and piloted program by the end of the academic year to propose to curriculum development, as well as publish for other medical schools to utilize.

I did not expect to be met with so much resistance outside of College of Human Medicine. While many educators across the country responded to a survey I conducted with positive remarks about the necessity of this kind of training, I also had respondents state that it was unnecessary and would hinder teaching of other topics. I presented my research at conferences geared towards medical educators and was disheartened by the lack of interest and by the quick glances at my poster’s title and hasty retreat to other presenters. I proudly wrote about my volunteer work and research in my residency application and remained stunned at every interviewer that asked me about every other (less impactful) research project on my application.

The hardest lesson I’ve learned is that no one wants to talk about sexual assault. With our country’s current climate surrounding women, their safety, and their reproductive freedom, it is more important than ever to support organizations like the YWCA, which protect and empower women.

Sexual assault exists in our community – whether or not we choose to acknowledge it. So, what can we do about it? We can start by believing survivors. Then, we can familiarize ourselves with resources in our area for safe shelters, free medical forensic exams and support networks. If you’re unsure where to start your search, this is a link to the National Sexual Violence Resource Center, which offers a directory of organizations that support sexual assault survivors and is searchable by state: https://www.nsvrc.org/organizations.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. We can’t show up for survivors without first showing up to the conversation. If survivors are brave enough to speak up, we should be brave enough to listen.